Food Fights, Arguments and Laughter
This not getting together with my kids for Sunday lunch is getting on my nerves! I’ve been thinking about family all week. Family for some is wonderful and a huge lifeline; for others, family is a source of pain and feeling disconnected. I think, for most of us it is a mixture of the two.
Growing up with my New York family was loud! The kind of loud where there are multiple conversations going on, food is everywhere, someone is yelling, a kid is crying and I soaked up every second of it. We grew up all mashed together with a thousand Jewish and Italian aunts, uncles and cousins. We were in and out of each other’s lives; we’d have Passover and Easter, Hanukkah and Christmas.
My mom was the smartest, funniest, kindest, loudest and strongest woman in the room. Our friends called her Momma Reid. She found love again and created a wonderful life after an abusive relationship with my biological father. She never gave up. She would start food fights; we would argue at the top of our lungs; we’d laugh till we cried; she was a great cook; she taught us how to be a loyal friend and tried really hard to be there for us. She became my best friend.
It’s not easy being there for your family, when you are trying to figure it all out for yourself. I wish she gave herself more grace, I wish I did too. We all make mistakes in this thing called family, what we do afterwards matters more.
I have outlived the age my mom was when she died; an aneurysm took her from me. My heart breaks that my kids never knew her, that we cannot call each other or share our lives together.
One thing I’m thankful for is that Dean got to know my mom and she loved him. We love remembering her life, being able to share her stories, and her traditions with our little family.
Dean, our four kids, their loves, two grand-kiddos and dogs have created a great, messy, loud family. We are in and out of each other’s lives. There is food every Sunday afternoon (there will be again!!!) with multiple conversations, someone yelling, a dog barking, a kid crying, lots of laughter and I sit back and soak up every single second of it.
The truth is that I love my family. I love that the good has created great moments to remember and the bad made us stronger and hopefully closer. We can choose that, you know. We can choose to forgive and learn from the hard and bad times. My mom used to say that you can learn something from everyone, whether what to do or what not to do. I can see how true that is in my life. Each person I know has impacted my life one way or another.
I don’t know where you are at with your family, but whether biological or chosen, family can and should be a place of support and love. Even with disagreements, hard-conversations and hurt, we can choose to be there for each other.
I will leave you with this blessing for your family:
“The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; The LORD turn His face toward you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:24-26
With Easter a week ago, remember why Jesus came and lived on Earth…so He could die for us. So, we can be a part of His family. No, we are not perfect. We need a lot of grace. He loves us and is standing with arms open, just waiting.
All My Love ~ Jodi xoxo
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